When I first got to Iraq, it became apparent that I couldn’t rely on a plug-in alarm clock to get me through the deployment. There are frequent power failures here. However, it seems that relying on a battery-operated clock isn’t doing me any favors either.
When I woke up Thursday morning, my clock wasn’t showing the time but was instead showing random LCD segments in its display. In fact, if button labels in this photo were at all legible, you would be able to see that the alarm is switched off even though the icon says otherwise.
I have a theory as to how this happened.
I received an e-mail that said Angelina Jolie would be on the base Thursday. This excited me, of course, because she seems to be fond of guys named Brad, and there was also the possibility of me getting adopted by her. Alas, none of this happened.
It turns out that her appearance on base caused a massive disruption in the space-time continuum, and my clock immediately failed. No doubt this was because of the black-hole-like quality in which men from this base flocked to where she was appearing. Even light (and exotic orphans) couldn’t escape her pull.
Somehow I managed to survive the day, but it cost me another $7 to buy the same crappy clock. Let’s hope Denise Richards doesn’t come here in August, or I may need to buy another clock.